Birthday Post!

It’s my birthday today so I thought  I’d have a different kind of post. As I grow older, I become much more aware of my female identity. What it means to be a woman, the many different shapes I can take, the roles that are foisted upon me, the experiences of my sisters, our status in this world that we live. I feel like growing older connects me to this world a bit more – perhaps because of my increasing experience living. So today, I will list 8 books that have had 8 different types of women in them. Books that spoke to me. They may not speak to you but they touched a chord in me.

863846Out – Natsuo Kirino
One of these women commit a murder, the other three help her get rid of a body. How this event changes these women and how it affects their psyche makes for a fascinating read. Perhaps a lot of it is Kirino’s skill at character building but I wonder if any one else who has read this book wondered if they too had it in them. I don’t condone murder, obviously, but I do recommend this book. It’s shocking and dense and leaves you thinking as the best books are wont to do.

 
12849260Small Damages by Beth Kephart
This is Kenzie’s story. Pregnant, grieving for her father and far from home. It is the beauty of the prose, the dulcet lyricism that first draws you in and then it is the setting that comes alive, Spain through Kenzie’s eyes, through the author’s imagination. I don’t know if such a Spain exists but I want to see it some day. Kenzie grows and grows in this novel. As her body grows heavier with child, her mind becomes open, wide enough to encompass the blue skies under which she finds a mother, a home and someone else to love.

 
308424Aya by Marguerite Abouet and Clement Oubrerie
This graphic novel details Aya’s struggles to become something more than what circumstances, peers and her family might want her to be. The story is set in the Ivory Coast and is a beautiful rendering of the life there from people who lived there and who know the customs. No appropriation. I identified with Aya’s feelings of separation, sense of not-belonging. Watching herself take a road that no one else seems to want to walk on. Eschewing the traditional roles to forge herself a new identity.

 
827729Girl, Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen
This is a nonfiction account of one woman’s experience in a mental asylum. Kaysen details the life in the asylum and made me wonder what it means to be sane. She had met a psychologist for a bare ten minutes or so before he had her committed. How could he know her mental state in just those ten minutes? What makes a woman sane? What does it mean to be insane? The friendships between the so-called crazies in the asylum unfolds in a very interesting manner. Their depths, their misunderstood pain, their final irrevocable actions that eject them from life.
13505257my name on his tongue: poems – Laila Halaby
I include this collection because it spoke to me so strongly about one woman’s desperation to keep that part of herself that is always longing for a home that is fast disappearing from this world sane. Halaby’s poems about Palestine, her sorrow at what is undeniably the murder of innocents fairly leaps off the pages into your heart making it skip a beat, making your eyes fill with tears. Even if you have nothing vested in the results of the Palestine/Israel conflict, these poems will speak to you about the people behind the labels. It spoke to me about home, about the temporary nature of home. How time steals what you held close the day before.

 
6952Like Water for Chocolate – Laura Esquivel
This novel, part magical realism, part pure magic, spoke to me about the depths of love, about food, about the relationships between a mother and a daughter. It showed me how the bonds between two people can be stretched until it breaks and how two people can deny everything of themselves between themselves but life will ultimately put them together as they were meant to be. Physical love, emotional love, love that spills over into the dishes made in the kitchen. Passion, fire, anger, hatred, love. This book is like a chaotic symphony of the senses.

 
2119409Real World – Natsuo Kirino
This novel speaks about the disconnect teenagers feel from the adult world. I have been doing a lot of theoretical reading about adolescents, the theories of adolescents, the construction of adolescence and one thing became very clear to me as I read and that was verbalized by Dr. Alison Waller, adolescents do not usually get a chance to create culture but are allowed to absorb it from an adult perspective. There are people like Homi Bhabhi who theorize that the relationship between adults and adolescents is like the relationship between colonizers and the colonized. However, I do not believe in that. This novel shows the curious lack of emotion or reaction to a murder. Four girls interact with the murderer without that shock or horror that one would normally expect. It’s a curious read. A disturbing one.

 
6260997Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide – Nicholas D. Kristoff, Sherryl WuDunn
This is hands down one of the most difficult books I have ever read. Or rather am still reading. It details some of the worst atrocities that can be committed to women, that ARE committed to women. My friend Rossi bought it for me and I thank her for it. Though perhaps I hate her a bit for it too. Because after reading this, there is no way you can sit snug in your warm safe room and be unaware that such things happen as you blink, as you breathe. As you live, someone else is being tortured, crying out for help. It is not all gloom and doom though, this book also lists the amazingly strong women who have gone through agony and survived to smile another day, to fight another say. And while this book makes me despair in some sections, in others it makes me fiercely proud to be a woman. To be part of a sisterhood that has strength even when people try to stomp it out of them.

And that is all for today.

my name on his tongue – Laila Halaby (A Review)

Paperback, 136 pages
Expected publication: May 7th 2012 by Syracuse University Press
Source: Net Galley

Synopsis:

Best-selling novelist and PEN Award winner Halaby presents readers with her first collection of poetry. Intensely personal and marked with a trenchant wit, these poems form a memoir following Halaby’s life as they explore the disorientation of exile, the challenge of navigating two cultures, and the struggle to shape her own creative identity. She shares the pain and confusion of growing up—the need for belonging and the solace of community—with tenderness and fearless candor. Rooted in her Middle Eastern heritage, these poems illuminate the Arab American experience over the last quarter century. Turning away from all that is esoteric and remote in American poetry today, Halaby’s lucid and forthright voice speaks to and for a large audience.

Review:

There are many things that make me cry. Cruelty to animals, elderly and children, Shah Rukh Khan (argh), war, good ice cream going to waste and others. Poetry, usually, is not one of them. While reading my name on his tongue, I was in parts awestruck, in parts jealous and in lots of parts weepy.

Confession: I don’t read a lot of poetry. Contemporary poetry even less The only reason I requested this title from Net Galley was simply because of the title. It intrigued me, piqued my curiousity and made me want to read the poem the verse was found in and I am so, so, so very glad that I took a chance with this. Halaby’s poetry is so exquisitely beautiful that I fear I lack the words to do it justice. More than the words she chooses to express herself in, it is the feelings embroidered in the punctuation, in the pauses, in the slight (written) hitch in breath you get as you read her poetry that marks it as genius.

Perhaps it is because I relate to the displacement that is one of the strongest themes in the book. Perhaps it is because I know what it feels like to be torn between two cultures, perhaps that’s why I teared up and cried as I read her contradictory feelings of grief and anger as she poetically navigates the murky American waters after the 9/11 attacks. Her yearning for home, her anger at the people tearing apart the place she finds her roots in, her voice, her passion – these are all so strong in this slim collection of poetry that you will pause and linger over her verses, read them again, muse over them and keep on thinking about them as you go about doing the mundane things that compose your day.

My favourite poem might be the first one but the one that made me cry was the last one. Do yourselves a favor, even if you do not read poetry usually, read this volume. It may change you in ways that you didn’t think possible.