Here’s an update: I’m writing.
By which I mean that while I’m not writing a certain number of words every day (what target?), I am actually enjoying writing. This does not mean it has suddenly become easy because, jeez, far from it. Because this is my second time seriously writing a novel, I expected things to be easier. *snort*
And since I am also in the querying stage and doubting I’ll ever move out of it (hope, yes, hope), for a while there, I was wondering if writing was what I want to do. Forget the fact that it’s all I can do, (my skills are very limited), the rejections are difficult to cope with as it erodes the self-esteem I never had in high supply anyway. ANYWAY, I don’t want to be a Debby Downer (who is that? well, whoever she is, I don’t want to be her), I have discovered that the second book is more fun to write than the first one.
I have always liked puzzles; I like figuring solutions to things no matter how snarled and knotty things are. For a while with this second book, I was afraid I had bitten off more than I could chew. Then I realized that my pace was too quick. Since this is just the first draft, I figure I can take my time, write as much as I want, indulge myself. And once I told myself that, the world opened up. I probably will curse this attitude when I’m doing revisions but right now, I’m having fun figuring out how to worldbuild without information dumping. How to drive the plot forward in organic ways and how to avoid depending on obvious plot devices. But mostly, it is worldbuilding that I am most preoccupied with. I feel like the world I have created is so amazing (doesn’t everyone?) and the second book gives me a chance to explore it. So I’m seeing it just as the reader will and if the wonder I feel while creating it can be expressed through my words to the reader, it’ll be happiness.